God Raised Him Up
I find myself flying from pole to pole in my spiritual life. At once I am motivated, captivated, and in love with Christ, the world, my friends and family, and the saints and angels. At another moment I find myself devoid of it all, and convinced that I cannot continue on the path that I once was determined to travel. It is a lack of faith to be sure, but it is also the nature of a man plagued by the past and disappointments of my former life.
Often as I read the Psalms I find myself able to identify with Israel and her struggles and failures, as one person embodying in my fractured self the life of this ancient kingdom. In me I can find the prophets that speak of the law, of the covenant of my baptism, of the love and severity of God, and in me I can find the fractured sufferers of a kingdom ruled by false prophets, priests and kings. I am a divided kingdom. Good kings come and go, and at the root is a fractured soul routed by enemies both within and without.
Today my reading schedule put me in Acts 2 where I read this, “This Man, delivered over by the predetermined plan and foreknowledge of God, you nailed to a cross by the hands of godless men and put Him to death. But God raised Him up again, putting an end to the agony of death, since it was impossible for Him to be held in its power.” This passage describes well the life of my own soul and the salvation that I long for by faith.
I have been baptized and have received the communion of the Holy Spirit by the grace of God the Father and through the loving-kindness of His eternal Son. Still, I find myself grieving Him in my inner life. I cause Him to suffer in me many losses and to suffer with me in the deepest sense of the word. I have nailed Him to the cross and I have put Him to death.
On the other hand, it is the power of God in which I hope. Because “God raised Him up again, putting an end to the agony of death, since it was impossible for Him to be held in its power.” My sin is not capable of routing Christ in my life. Obviously there is free will, and I am free to deny Him and he will leave as asked, but there is hope in the faith, no matter the amount or strength, that Christ will not be routed from my struggle or lose in my inner battle so long as I hope in Him. I may suffer all kinds of loss, but He will not lose ground. Why do I have this hope? Because it is not possible for Him to be held by its power.
He will be faithful, though I be faithless, for it is not possible that He should be held by the power of any sin in anyone. To God be the praise and glory forever!
